Why Is Potty Training Kids So Hard?

If there is one part of bringing up children that all parents struggle with, it is potty training kids. This can be a frustrating time of a parent's life and a potentially traumatic time of a child's life if it isn't done in the right way. Trying to begin potty training kids too early is the most common reason why it fails the first time around, so taking your time is something that you should definitely do.

Most parents are in a race with their friends and all of their children's parents to see who can get the potty training underway first, but this is never a good idea. Each child develops at a completely different pace than another does, and it is certainly not a race. In fact, trying to do it too quickly or too soon will only make both of you frustrated and feeling like you don't measure up. Follow the child's lead, not the calendar.

Instead of measuring your child against other children in the neighborhood or in their preschool, you should be paying closer attention to your own child to see if they are showing signs of wanting to use the toilet. Potty training kids takes knowing the personality of your child, what their normal behaviors are, and determining when they are starting to show interest in using the toilet. Once they start to want to go to the bathroom on their own or wear "big boy" pants, then you know that it is time.

Your child should physically be able to sit down on a toilet, stand up on their own, and pull up and down their own pants. Without these basic skills, no amount of training will ever work. Remember that the calendar is not your guide to potty training kids and that by paying attention to your child's development; you will get the best results.

Accidents will happen as your child learns to use the toilet. Decide now that you will deal with them in a calm, matter of fact manner instead of seething or going into a rage. Almost all children will have at least a few accidents, so understand that it's a part of the process and not a sign that things aren't going right.

Your child might become stubborn or defiant. This is normal, too because the toddler and preschool years are when children start to push to assert their independence. Of course, being children, they don't always choose the most productive way to go about this, so expect some NO's, tantrums, defiance and backtalk. Set firm limits, but don't let it get to you.

Potty training a toddler is not the easiest thing in the world, but you do have the power to adjust your attitude and see the rough patches as opportunities for you and your child to learn. Even if it seems like nothing much is being accomplished, have faith that things will get better.

Nicole T Spencer is a freelance writer whose passion is helping loving parents raise happy children. Get more help with potty training by visiting the Potty Training Power website and downloading the free "7 Potty Training Mistakes Most Parents Make" report. Nicole has written several articles on how to potty train a child which are also posted on the site.